Musing on Blogging

What Is It to Blog for Me

To me a blog is like a mix of diary with a bit of something else that the poster hopes to be read that tends to add in insightful content, news, or other informative topics.

Existing somewhere between personal and professional. Like an exploration of a topic or event from a person on the internet logging it down in an open & sometimes collaborative diary format. Yet, when I search online the pointers are all geared towards the idea that the blog is to be considered as a business or enterprise with a focused Business plan. I get it for sure and can hear the old stupid quip I recall all the time.

"Fail to plan, is a plan to Fail"

• Some corny line I stole somewhere and can't credit properly

The way I still see it is to just enjoy the process. Let something flow and keep up with it. I do get that there is Mastodon for "microblogging" but I prattle and take time to expound on things. This is how I plan to use this site and the toots can be saved for the quippy stuff that is shorter & of course for BOOSTING awesome fediverse content!!

So my idea about the blogging process is to format it in a way that ensures I check back & post things. In the past, my previous failed blogs were because of being stupid & goofy in ambition with its scope. This time around I'm going to engage in a recreational manner so to walk my way into having a blog that I enjoy engagaing with.

In the past, my blog was going to be video game reviews or tech projects or guides but then I sat there stressing out or freaking out that I don't have the skills to even develop the piece. Well, that was bad reason to not start and obvious with hindsight very self-sabotaging. Though honestly I did want to do a great job as well as learn all that I could. I do rather enjoy technology but not as a J-O-B so I put too much on myself in that regard. Not that it should have been hard but nowadays I really don't have any technical exuse not to be able to easily blog.

My thinking is that I will do updates and occasional musing that hopefully does two things. First my updates will serve as a poker to my behind to get things done by publishing it. I will be on the record and its out there to haunt me. Then lastly the second thing is my musings will serve as a generator of spawning ideas. Spawning and capturing them in some manner. Too often in the past a good thought or idea escaped me because of not writing it down then it eludes me further down the road.

Something I learned after dragging my feet and behind for so long with tech & Linux is that I just have to make the jump and just have fun. So I should just start doing it without overthinking it. I have an issue of having a love of reading but also terrible FOCUS & FOLLOW THROUGH. So those together just compound issues for me.

Not to mention that three to four years back my health changed and so did how my body with ADHD. The anxiety that use to always eek out of me burned away but it hurt me losing that anxiety because I used that to meet deadlines & push myself with it. Positive side of things though, I do sleep better and my palms aren't always sweaty along with a lot less worrying/freaking people out. I guess over the years it was unknown to me but I guess I had little control of how my emotions appeared outwardly. Odd because I guess I was usually opposite of how I felt inside.

Then the last thing was due to my health, ADHD change later in life, or Covid issue I got something like long covid but I do not think it was that. It caused a massive change how my mind worked and had an effect on me in a way kind of like a small stroke. It slowed down my thinking making it foggy and even how I talked or its candenance slowed down for quite some time and I believe caused people to think lesser of me(more so than I may have understood previously). In the past, my mind ran ten thousand miles a minute but I could grab thoughts when needed quickly. For quite some time it was a struggle with silence in my head. My language became slower and people treated me different. It took quite some time to retrain my mind.

I appreciate the change in a lot of ways but hopefully it was due to getting older and not an underlying issue that I'm unaware of. Unlike in the past, I often lack less ability now to stay focused but I do wake up more early as well on time and even pass out at more approiate times along as just not being as stressed out as much. This might be a better time for me personally to blog. Unlike the past I don't get carried off in something that steals my interest and thoughts. Not saying the focus will be great but I won't get lost or fall into a hole of depression as often that would cloud my work.

Blogging into the Ether

To blog out there and to let myself and others understand what may be coming it will be a lot of Tech related stuff. Not a lot of hardware even though I do love that older retro tech. It will focus on Linux and open source because those are my joys in life after finally later in life taking the plunge with them. I'm no expert nor do I have some kind of amazing background that will wow anyone, so the posts will probably just be more about me being barely comfortable with something that I just learned about. It will be more of a showcase of things that I like & enjoy. I enjoy VIM and might learn more about Neovim or a little bit of programming language but don't expect anything super insightful.

Another issue is politics and I am a liberal so please bear with me. I rather enjoy being a Liberal Democrat but I do live in a very rural conservative area that comes at odd with that A LOT. I have some history struggling to get the local party off the ground. It just sucks because being rural we don't have the establishment. I rather like following the state party rules but nobody wants to operate in that manner and it falls just to me. WHICH STINKS, being a democrat its supposed to be about democracy & a team effort. Too often we point fingers and depend on me, who is a boring person of no renown which becomes something they point at. I dislike that. So perhaps, my blog will explore alternate methods of organizing our local Democrat party.

I find it frustrating that I can often discuss(not able to change minds) more often with the Republicans, Libertarians, and other political mutts in my life. Though those I identify with politically are ones that we can't rally together. My thinking at the moment after a lot of failure is the old ways and rules right now might not work. We may need more casual methods & no formal meetup but its difficult because our society is doing things alone or often we are too pressed to show up for that long. It might need to be easier no big ask events that have prepackaged snacks & drinks because this era has concern for food (BUT NOT F***ING RFK JR AS HEALTH Secretary ot$%$%$). So yeah we may see this come up more. Just look how much I yakked about this topic so far.

Something that also interest me are cooperatives. Being rural we have these and I don't see why we can't enjoy this and teach about them more. Like one idea is a local tech coop to encourage skill development. It could develop into a group that promotes open source locally and try to promote it while also self-improving. I will flesh that out more but I'm unsure where it will lead. Though I do have some ideas about it and may muse a lot about it. This could be cooperative or anarchist self organizing or whatever. I rather enjoy the idea of involving art, code, literature, political autonomy & advocacy,crafting, gardening, self-employment, and other aspects intersecting with this idea.

Maybe travel and food could be added blog topics. I have some interest with fishing, visiting other Episcopal churches, and traveling around before maybe moving off from Oklahoma in the future. Just like code I want to cook more and Cajun food interest me currently but that could be explored more in the blog.

I have interest in exploring faith more with the Episcopal church but that may be another blog or just personal effort. It may pop up like with the travel suggestion but still working on that. My daughter got me back into church and it means more to me than I thought it would and in my remaining years I see it being there in my life.

I'm just not sure how strong I want to be publicly. Recently went to a weekend seminar and got excited as well as enjoyed meeting other members. Heck just using Mastodon I've enjoyed reaching out and surprised how many Episcopalians are out there. Its just that I have reservation that I might repeat what I've done with "Tech" projects & Democrat party organizing that I failed at. A bit of me just thinks maybe I should be like the old farmers and other local men I've known that are church members & strong supporters but not always leadership. The Episcopal church has helped me in a way to find something better that I couldn't find in politics. So I have some hesitation in seeking any leadership role because of concern that I might try to mix those two. Though the diocese is amazing and I'm proud of their current efforts on evangelism & other efforts. Its quite Infectious to share in the joy & excitement everyone brings.

It does seem like I have quite a few ideas here. So I should be able to maintain this blog with that in mind.

Thanks for enduring my musings.

• Adubya